Selecting a vibrator or other sex toy can be a very frustrating experience, which is ironic since frustration is what you're trying to resolve by making the purchase in the first place. Nonetheless, with the amazing number of alternatives to select from, the wide range of prices, rainbow of colors, abundance of clever concepts, array of materials, and the eternal question of buzzing vs. whirring vs. rotating vs. static – it's not too surprising that one can easily feel overwhelmed, uninformed and even a little desperate during the process. Selecting a vibrator as a gift for a friend can be even more intimidating.

Fortunately, this is an area where the art of love and the science of technology are compatible. With a little knowledge and forethought, the process of choosing a toy – whether it's your first or your 40th – can be rather enjoyable, perhaps even a form of foreplay. Regardless of context, one's results are always improved by using the right tool for any job. Sex toys are no different. In order to determine which of the many pretty packages of fun sex tools is correct for your fleshly project, there are a number of important questions to ask. Among them are:

Who will use the toy?

Why will they use the toy?

When will they use the toy?

Where will they use the toy?

What kind of sensation are they hoping to experience?

These questions may seem unusual, but once they have been answered, it will be much easier to determine the kind of toy best suited for the job at hand and the person employing it.

Who will use the toy
When answering this question, consider the age, gender, overall health, and physical and emotional condition of the person who'll be enjoying this item. A young, slim, or sexually inexperienced woman may well be better suited for a different kind of vibrator than an older, heavier, or more sexually experienced woman, for instance. Furthermore, a pregnant woman may want to focus more on clitoral stimulation than vaginal penetration, a factor that influences the decision making process. A man's enjoyment will depend on a number of different factors from a woman and a transgendered person likewise has unique sensual needs. Allergies are also important to consider, since sensitivities to latex or other common sex toy materials will affect what items will be suitable for use and under what circumstances. Also, remember to consider the state of mind of the user. Are they comfortable with masturbation or use of toys or are they apprehensive, possibly even morally conflicted?

Why will they use the toy
Will this device be used primarily for solo sex or as part of partnered sex? In order to enhance orgasm or in order to help improve orgasmic response? Is the user "in training" and working up to larger toys for anal or vaginal sex? Are they monogamous but seeking a double penetration experience? In the case of post-operative transgendered women, is the goal to increase vaginal elasticity? Is the user emotionally uncomfortable with certain kinds of touch and hoping to become more used to the sensation by use of a toy? If a man, is he seeking to increase endurance, decrease/increase sensation, or alter the appearance of their genitals in some way? Is the toy part of experimentation or purchased out of a feeling of necessity, perhaps after surgery or due to a medical condition? Each of these elements can influence which toys are more appropriate for the user.

When will they use the toy
Is this new toy going to be used before or during sex with another person, either privately or during a party? Or will it be used only during the owner's alone time? Will it sometimes replace or supplement a partner's mouth, hand, or genitals? Will it be used as part of a more elaborate sexual scenario? Will it be used frequently or only occasionally? Does the recipient travel and need something small to carry with them, perhaps in a pocket or purse? Some objects will draw more attention than others if they pass through airport security. A favorite metal cock ring or cage might be embarrassing to explain, for instance. But a snapping leather strap can be worn on the wrist, while a simple black rubber ring will go unnoticed through an X-ray machine.

Where will they use the toy
Do they need to be discreet while using the item in question or might they want to show it off to others? Will battery buzz or vibration sounds be acceptable or should the object be silent? Do they want to be more sexual in the shower or another aquatic environment? The clit-delicious vibrator perfect for using during doggie-style probably isn't the best choice for masturbation during a bubble bath or in the hot tub. Will it be used indoors or outdoors? Giving someone an electric vibrator to take on camping trips might not be as practical as a battery driven vibe or a hand-operated dildo, for example.

What kind of sensation are they hoping to experience
For women, the big question is generally whether vaginal or clitoral stimulation is the goal. If vaginal, is the G-Spot a target for pleasure or does she desire a feeling of fullness? In all cases, personal preference should be considered when evaluating vibration intensity. Some women prefer the more gentle vibration of some battery operated vibes while others adore the more aggressive stimulation of an electric massager. Both men and woman can enjoy anal penetration and/or stimulation. Some women find that it can enhance G-Spot sensation – and the male prostate nearly always likes some attention. Anal vibration generally does little for women, although many men find that their prostate enjoys the extra stimulation. Make sure anything used for anal play has a flanged bottom or some other method of making sure it doesn't slip inside, especially if it vibrates. It doesn't take much heat to put the rectum at risk. If a penile constriction device of some sort is desired, what sort of pressure does the man prefer and how quickly and easily will he want to be able to remove the ring?

By answering these questions, the dizzying array of candy colored sex toys on the shelves will become less confusing and your choices will more appropriately cater to the sensual needs in question.

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